Tuesday, 19 June 2012

A whole new world




A whole new world
Every turn a surprise  
With new horizons to pursue  
Every moment red-letter  
I'll chase them anywhere  
There's time to spare 
Let me share this whole new world with you 
{A Whole New World}


I feel like I have lived a whole month in one week. My world has been turned upside down, and it seems that  for our family, we are about to enter a whole new world. Unfortunately, there was no magic carpet ride, but there was a handsome man beside me!


Last week my husband and I came to the realisation that we cannot go on as we currently are. Cracks are beginning to show in lots of places, and if we don't do something about it, it has the potential to tear this family apart. Our lifestyle is not sustainable as it is long term. Our stress levels are through the roof.


Mighty Prince Warrior runs and owns two businesses, and he has been very busy between the two. Which is great, but it means that he leaves for work early and sometimes works 6 days a week, then comes home and cooks dinner. I suffer from long term health problems and homeschooling the boys is putting strain on my already burnt out body. 


So we have made a decision that I didn't foresee coming, but my husband and I have had to make for our family's sake. After homeschooling for 4 years, we have made the very difficult decision to send the boys to school in July. 
I felt the God Whisper last week, and it was confirmed when I spoke to my Mighty Prince Warrior about it. 
We agree that it is the right thing to do. Homeschooling has come at a cost for our family. Due to my health I am running on the 'petrol light' so to speak, constantly. I am living in survival mode and barely getting by. 


Even though I have His peace over the situation, the day after we made the decision, I broke down. I sobbed on my kitchen floor. 


I cried because I couldn't give my boys what they needed - a nurturing mother who wasn't always exhausted. I cried for our family's dream of homeschooling, and how reality doesn't often line up with how I envision life will go. I cried because I felt like a failure. I cried because I am afraid of the road ahead. I cried because I worry how my boys will cope with the transition. I cried because I am unsure whether or not the change is temporary or permanent. 








Bottom line is, if we don't change something it could destroy our family. But if we do this, my body might be given an opportunity to heal. And if my body heals, my boys can have a mother who is full of energy, patient and not too tired all the time to do things with them. My husband can come home to a wife that looks after him, not the other way around. Not that he has ever complained about this. He picks up my slack, but it is exhausting him too.


And so very soon we will enter a whole new world of drop off and pick ups and packing lunches. I will enter a whole new world of dropping the title of homeschooling mum, and picking back up the title of stay at home mum. I will endeavor to rest (if I can remember how to do that.)


Change is never easy. But I know God is behind this. And I am trusting Him every step of the way as my husband and I go through the process of deciding what school to send our boys to. I am trusting that He loves my boys even more than I do and will look after them, protect them and help them with the transition. 


And while our family is going through a season of change, I know that He never does.


I am the Lord, and I do not change - Malachi 3:6


We have been singing an incredible new song by Generation Music (yet to be released) in church on Sunday and the chorus goes like this:


I know, my God and He knows me |Before I speak He knows every need|I am found in You|Jesus, the rock on which I stand|You hold my world in the palm of Your hand|I am found in You


And so this is where faith (which really means trusting God) really kicks in. I am trusting that He knows my needs before I speak. I am trusting that He holds my world in the palm of His hand. Jesus is the rock on which I stand. And that is a good thing, because I'm sure I will be tossed around as we enter a whole new world, and I need a strong foundation on which to stand.


Still taking lessons from the King,















31 comments:

  1. WoW Jo!

    You continue to amaze me, did you know that!
    Hard decisions are just that, hard. Bless you for listening to what is best for you and you family. Live in the freedom of the choices God is opening up , and I pray my beautiful friend that you do not allow any guilt or condemnation creep into your mind. I love that you will give your all to make yourself the absolute best Mum possible. You are amazing for playing the homeschool role for so long in obedience to our Heavenly father, And sweet princess live free now you are releasing them after a time of prayer and consideration. I look forward to getting to know the more rested version of Jo!

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    1. Thank you Kerrie. Your comment made me cry to think I have such an encouraging friend. xo

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  2. When you asked for prayer in your last post I had an inkling that this might be it. Jo, you are a wife and mum first and foremost. While I can understand the range of emotions you must be experiencing, you are right in that it's time to trust God and know that He will work all things out as he has your family's best interests at heart:)
    Hats off to you for homeschooling with your health issues ! You've done well to do it for four years.
    School is not bad and I pray that He leads you to the best place for your boys.
    I pray that this new season will bring much needed healing to your body soul and spirit and that your family life will be blessed !
    Xoxoxo
    Rosemary

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    1. Thank you Rosemary. Truly thank you for your always encouraging words and prayers. Here's to a new season and my family being blessed! xo

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  3. hugs kisses and prayers being sent your way
    thank-you for being open and honest about your journey:)

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  4. You and that man of yours have this!
    You can do this because you are strong and obedient children of a mighty Father.
    And you have great friends (one amazing one in particular..*cough*) who will celebrate with rejoice and cry with you.
    It's going to be an up and down journey but you have this!!!

    Love you xxxx

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    1. Thank you Stacey. You know what this is like having just transitioned your girls from homeschooling to school. I've got this. We've got this.
      Thank you for always being just a phone call away. You have no idea what your friendship means to me. I love you and love that you rejoice and cry with me. xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

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  5. You are awesome my friend! Well done for making this very difficult decision. It's moments like these when we have to believe that God has us (and our children) in His hands. Take a deep breath, you can do this! It may well be wonderful too! I'll be thinking of you over the coming weeks and praying your body can rest and begin to heal. What a great mum you are! Mel. xx

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    1. Thank you Mel! It was a very difficult decision, but one that i know is best for our family. Yes - it's moments like these (I need minties) to to really trust Him with my family.
      I would so appreciate your prayers. xo

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  6. {{hugs}} You are not a failure Jo.
    You are Jo first of all before you are a wife and mother, sister, daughter or friend or any of the other hats you wear. You need to look after your temple and unfortunately it needs to be done here on earth where life is not so perfect.
    Thank you for being honest. There are so many homeschool moms who need to make this decision and don't. And to the detriment of themselves, families and children because they fear the backlash of the homeschool society.

    I am so proud to be one of your friends and read this post. It oozes with the strength of who you are.

    You are not doing wrong by your family my friend. You are seeking healing and help and it takes strength and courage to do that.

    You are part of a much greater body the body of Christ and we love you. Thank you for letting us know that you need more support and uplifting.

    I look forward to many more Princess Warrior Lessons upon this journey of yours.

    Rest well and enjoy the next three weeks of home with the boys. NO SCHOOL just enjoy and prepare S L O W L Y and call up those neighbours to do the driving around to help you with that preparation.

    PS Crockpot cooking works well when there's no energy at the end of the day. Throw the ingredients in when you feel up to it in the am and let it simmer away during the day and serve at night.
    We Love you Jo
    xxxxx

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    1. 25 And I will restore or replace for you the years that the locust has eaten—the hopping locust, the stripping locust, and the crawling locust, My great army which I sent among you.

      26 And you shall eat in plenty and be satisfied and praise the name of the Lord, your God, Who has dealt wondrously with you. And My people shall never be put to shame. Joel 2:25-26

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    2. And afterward I will pour out My Spirit upon all flesh; and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, your old men shall dream dreams, your
      young men shall see visions. Joel 2:28

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    3. Chareen your words are such a blessing to me and I cried reading them. Thank you so much for your love and support xo

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    4. any time Jo. When you need a cuppa with a friend I'll inbox you my number and we can share one over the phone :)

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  7. Oh it can't have been easy to make that decision! But I applaud you for it -- to make the scary change, trusting God and doing the best you can. You saw the need, prayed, considered, and acted, all in faith. I am excited for you and this season of rest and (hopefully!) healing.

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    1. Thank you Beth. It was not an easy decision. But parenting is about making the hard decisions.I am excited for the new season too. xo

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  8. Big changes for your household: but most of all I honour you for being flexible and adapting to what your family (and you!) need at this time. Do NOT see yourself as a failure - nothing can change all that you have sowed into your boys and it will stand them good stead in the future. This is just a different season xxx

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    1. Thanks Janet! I don't see myself as a failure. I feel sad that my health prevented me from continuing, but that is not my fault. Here's to a new season hey?! xo

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  9. Hi Jo,
    I know what it's like to have to say goodbye to dreams... there is a time and process of grief. Grieving for that loss of dreams, that which will not be.

    But there is good news and you've got a hint of it... you'll experience it in abundance because you have a heart to look to the Lord.

    And THAT is the key - in the midst of everything, Give Thanks to the Lord.

    Bless you dear sister in Christ... I'll be hoping and praying for your family :)

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    1. Yes. I know I am right smack bang in the middle of the grieving process. You are right - that is the key-giving thanks in the midst of everything.
      Thank you for your encouragement and prayers Susan xo

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  10. Hi Jo,

    :) Making those tough decisions, is just that, tough. All the best for this new part of the journey you and your family are on.

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  11. All the best Jo. May God bless you in this new phase of live. Stay in touch.

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    1. Thank you Jeanne. Definitely will stay in touch. xo

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  12. Don't feel guilty, Jo! You are a wonderful Mum and you have done great things with your boys. Good on you for listening to God's prompting. (I know many who haven't and it has destroyed their lives). You are a Mum, that is a gift, and God wants you to be the best Mum you can be. If that means you need to send them to school, so you can heal then you must do that. In the long run you, your husband & your kids will ALL benefit. School will open up a whole new world for them. I haven't known you long but I do know how huge this decision was for you. My prayers and thoughts go up for you and your family. xxoo

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    1. Thanks Liz. I don't feel guilty. Just sad for that the old season is ending. God sure does want me to be the best mum I can be. I know that my whole family will benefit. It was a huge decision. Thank you for your prayers and encouraging words. xo

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  13. Dear Jo, I can hear your cry in your words. It's wonderful that we can put our trust in Jesus and His love and know that He cares for us and he will lead and guide us into all truth. I've prayed for you this morning that you will sense the Holy Spirits comfort and for the right school for your boys to go to! Emmanuel - God is with us. Lot's of love xxx

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    1. Thank you Sarah. I appreciate your words and prayers. xo

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  14. Wow Jo, I haven't had a chance to catch up and read much on blog land, but wow. I can understand how hard this must be for you - I pray that the transition will go smoothly and that you will find the perfect school environment and community for your precious family to join and become a part of.
    Many blessings!

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    1. Thank you Gail. It was extremely hard, but I know that He is so in this. xo

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Thanks for sharing your thoughts on my lessons!

I appreciate you taking the time to comment.

Love,
Jo Princess Warrior xo