Thursday, 22 September 2011

I'm just a mother

Lately I have been pondering the question, "What if my whole mission on this earth is just to be a mother?" and "Would I be OK with that?" Since I was a little girl I have been wanting to stand out. All my striving in adulthood stems from a place of wanting to matter and of a desire to feel special. I thought  that if I could be one of those women that do amazing things than people would love me. These women are put on a pedestal and are loved and admired. I wanted to be like them.

I'll be honest, when this question first burned in my spirit, I was a little concerned.  That can't be all He wants me to do on this earth? I am destined for greatness. What about all those inspirational quotes that tell me that I can do anything I want; that I am destined to shine; that we only have one life so make it count?  I can't be just a mother. That sounds so mundane, so boring, so ordinary.  I have been pondering this question for more than a month now.

In this day and age we mothers feel pressure to be more than 'just a mother'. If you are a stay at home mum you should also have an online ministry, a blog with a gazillion followers, or at least an etsy shop to sell your wares. I'm not saying these are bad things. If this is what God has called you to do, then -go for it! But there is a real sense that you can't just be a mother. You need to be a mother and then some.

I don't just feel this immense pressure in society only. I have felt it in His church too. You must be running a connect group, volunteering and be at every meeting. I am happy to say that I have finally found a local church that gives grace, and does not put heavy expectations on me to do these things. Please hear what I'm saying. I am not saying that it is wrong to serve in the church. In fact, I believe that serving in the Body of Christ through the local church is part of His design for His church. I am involved on a ministry team in my own local church, but only because I believe He has called me to support this particular ministry. I'm just saying that there are seasons in a mothers life when it's OK just to be a mother. Listening to His whispers in your spirit is vital. Earlier on in my journey of motherhood I strived to try and keep up with those in entirely different seasons in their life. I started a mothers group when my first child was 4 months old. 2 years and 2 babies later, I experienced depression. I felt pressure from the church I was attending, and put pressure on myself to continue serving as I did before I had children. I hadn't learned then about seasons in my life, and that it is OK to have a time of pulling back from serving in the local church in certain seasons.

I seem to go round and round the mulberry bush and come back to the same point. I have noticed a pattern. I get enthusiastic about my role as a mother and then I lose focus and look around me at what others are doing and say, "I want to do what she's doing!" And then I start working towards copying the person I admire. I strive to be like her and then I fall over. It's a clumsy fit because it's not what He has called me to do. I don't know why He calls some who are mothers to do far and beyond the call of motherhood. It's not for me to know. I just have to trust that He calls some and not others. 

But I do know that even though society looks down their nose at those that choose to be 'just a mother', He doesn't. God knows the powerful influence mothers have over the children. God knows that when we are cleaning up a mess spilt on the floor for the hundredth time that day, we are actually doing it for Him.
 "Then the King will answer, 'I tell you the truth, anything you did for even the least of my people here, you also did for me.'{Matt 25:40}
Even though people might not see value in the role of a mother, He does. And He promises to lead those of us who are mothers as we take care of our(His) lambs. 

 He takes care of his people like a shepherd. He gathers them like lambs in his arms
       and carries them close to him. He gently leads the mothers of the lambs. {Isaiah 40:11}

If all I achieved in this life was nurturing and raising my children than I would be following the footsteps of some amazing women. One of them that comes to mind is Mary, the mother of Jesus.  Her only recorded mission on this earth was to be a mother to Jesus, and her other children that she went to go on to have with Joseph. 

And all those inspirational quotes? Well they are right in a way. I will make my life count. I am destined for greatness. I can do anything I want to. And I choose to be 'just a mother', if that is what He wants me to be.  After all,  I am the only one in the world that can fulfil that role in my children's life. 

” The hand that rocks the cradle – Is the hand that rules the world.”

Still taking lessons from the King,


  1. So beautifully written - and just what I needed to read. Thank you. xoxo

  2. An AWESOME post Jo. And gosh, I think I've danced around that mulberry bush about a million times. It comes back to walking in step with Him and those whispers being heard and not ignored!

    This time out I've had from everything at home has been invaluable - I will be doing life a bit differently when we return - because I've heard.

    Love what you've written here - no one can ever know what one mother is doing from the next - as long as they know they were born for such a time as 'this' in it's differing contexts!

  3. I'm just gonna let that one rest in my heart a day or so...


  4. I'm learning the same thing, been going round that mulberry bush for a long time myself!!

  5. I agree with other commenters that this is an exceptional post. At one point I was reminded of a interview I read with the author Ken Kesey, who, in his younger days had a huge impact on the youth culture of the 60s. Kesey was interviewed at his farm in Oregon. The interviewer asked him what he was doing to change the world. Kesey replied, "Well, this year I'm growing asparagus."

    We all have our part to play. You never know what your efforts as a mother today will bring about in our world, today and in all the days to come!

  6. It's hard to maintain an eternal perspective at times - I struggle with wanting more than 'just being a mum'. I want to have it all. But God knows us, He knows what fits us best and only He knows the impact we will have on future generations by being 'just' a mother.

  7. Hey Jo..what a powerful post..
    but I have never felt like i was JUST A MOTHER..yes I believe as you do that , there are times when I feel like I want to stand out, or do something Amazing in my life time..but then I realize that I am...and that I do every day.. and those feelings only come around when i am looking at WORLDY things.. God has entrusted me with his children..WOW.. that is huge..
    Not every woman gets to do that.. and with his daily guidance and my creativity (which also comes from him) I get to be used by God to guide and develope a wonderful person who I teach to love God and be a wonderful person.. We have one of the most IMPORTANT, INFLUENCIAL, LIFE CHANGING JOBS , THIS SIDE OF HEAVEN.. We are not JUST MOMS.. we are extentions of Gods teaching. If we put our thoughs and longing into the worldly desires, we can not give our children all that is required of us..Im so glad you and I are MOMS.. what a blessing..
    Awesome Post... as usual :)

  8. Hi Jo, I hear you on this one. It is so hard changing those perceptions that we have heard all our lives - to do something great, especially in our generation. Yet, what could be greater than doing our best for God everyday at home with our amazing gifts from God.
    Due to my ambitious nature - and the leadership gifts he has given me - I struggle to just serve each week in church without getting in deeper than God wants me to. So, for this current season he has called me not to serve, which I find SO very hard to do. I love being involved! He calls me to a higher purpose and my training ground is in training my boys for their future purpose. Whenever I start to look elsewhere I always think of how many people my kids will impact in their life. not giving my all might see 1 less soul saved and that is so much more important than anything!!!



    A lot of the men in the above article said that their mum was the woman they admired most. I want to be that sort of mum, admired by my children and adored by my husband. Who cares what the rest of the world thinks?

    Best wishes
    Jen in NSW

  10. Very beautiful Jo! Yes, all moms are called by Him to be a mother, to raise her children to know Him and love Him. Some are called to do more than that and others are not. It's not for us to judge or question. We simply need to obey. Thank you for an inspiring post about the importance and value that comes with motherhood.

    ~Blessings my sweet friend,


Thanks for sharing your thoughts on my lessons!

I appreciate you taking the time to comment.

Jo Princess Warrior xo